


The pros and cons of being a dragon.

by Imasuckerforships



Series: The World to you series [2]
Category: The New Legends of Monkey (TV)
Genre: #TPACOBAD, And most importantly Kaedo will snacc, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canonical Child Abuse, Dragons, Elemental Magic, Emotional Trauma, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Falling In Love, Family, Family Bonding, Family Dynamics, Family Feels, Father Monkey, Fatherly Love, Fights, Found Family, Gen, Getting to Know Each Other, Hakuru will be badass and evil and a villain, Healing, Heavy Angst, Hugs, I LOVE THIS ALREADY, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I hate Zeus, I love Kaedo he’s an adorable cinnamon roll, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Kaedo & Monkey, Kaedo Zef, Kaedo does not get a break, Kaedo is to young to understand much, Kaedo needs help, Love, Manipulation, Monkey is a big softie, Monkey will attac, Mother Trip, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Pigsy and Sand are each other’s support couple, Pigsy/Sandy - Freeform, Rating May Change, Romance, Sandsy, Team as Family, Trip and Monkey are a power couple, Trip will protec, Tripitaka/Monkey - Freeform, Tripkey, Underage Drinking, angst with happy ending, give him a hug, mental trauma, not sure yet - Freeform, part 2 to The World to You, powers, scrolls
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-16
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:07:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28098162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imasuckerforships/pseuds/Imasuckerforships
Summary: After the gang is back together after Monkeys fateful demise into the sun.Kaedo needs to learn how to be a dragon. Apart from his powers and mind are a bit messed up.But with a new villain on the war path, a villain who knew his father his trauma decides to show up again............Not that it was ever gone to begin with.-READ THE WORLD TO YOU BEFORE THIS--THIS IS THE SEQUEL TO THE WORLD TO YOU-
Relationships: Everyone & Everyone, Kaedo Zef & Monkey King (The New Legends of Monkey), Kaedo Zef & OC, Kaedo Zef & Original Characters, Kaedo Zef & Sandy (The New Legends of Monkey), Kaedo Zef & Tripitaka (The New Legends Of Monkey), Monkey King & Pigsy & Sandy & Tripitaka & Kaedo Zef (The New Legends of Monkey), Monkey King & Pigsy (The New Legends of Monkey), Monkey King & Sandy (The New Legends of Monkey), Monkey King & Tripitaka (The New Legends of Monkey), Monkey King/Tripitaka (The New Legends of Monkey), Pigsy/Sandy (The New Legends of Monkey)
Series: The World to you series [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2058492
Comments: 6
Kudos: 3





	1. Panic attacks

**Author's Note:**

> The sequel I never anticipated to write. Enjoy.

I thought everything would get better.  
I had a family. I had love. I had a mother and a father. I had my friends. People who cared about me. But.. no. It never got better.

It was a few weeks later. All of us had gotten into the old routine. Walk for a bit, set up camp. And walk again the next day. My bruises had gone now, every time I caught my reflection in the shine of a metal kettle I’d smile to myself, flashing my newly sharp teeth.  
Pigsy has done a bit of reading on dragons. Back in Jade mountain that is. He said I’m only starting dragon puberty. He says all dragons go through it. He tried to explain how god puberty and dragon puberty where very similar. Our powers increase, and we get mature. Of course I already knew this. My... Ex father. Taught me. Forced me to read. I turned to the Pig god, he was busy cooking. Sandy and Trip had gone of to bath. My father, Monkey was collecting fire wood.  
Pigsy was concentrating on adding in certain things, he cooked like it was art.  
“So.”, I said, trying to start up a conversation. To be honest, I don’t have much of a relationship with Pigsy.  
“Have any sudden dragon puberty things yet?”  
I shook my head, Pigsy hummed, stirring the pan. I smelt something so nostalgic. “Bacon. Hard to get.”, He said and I could here the sizzling of the cooking fat.  
“Oh. Smells good. Think I could learn?”  
He shrugged. And welcomed me over, his hand ghosting my arm, it only lasted for a second but he took it of. Only if I had noticed the way I locked up, if only I had told them. But I didn’t. To blind with hunger. And the chance to learn something new.  
“Right.. So..”

Monkey returned, and dumped the wood down. He ruffled my hair. “Nice cooking kid.”, He said and sat down on his bed roll.  
I smiled awkwardly up to him. He’s the only person I’ve let touch me. Trips next. Sandy doesn’t touch anyone so. And Pigsy I’ll learn to eventually. But for now.  
“Yeah. Uncle Pigsys teaching me.”, I said. That’s what I called him. Uncle and auntie. Seems fitting for the other pair of love birds.  
“That’s good.”  
I rubbed my hands on my leather suit. I burgees against my tracker, an electric ran up my fingers, it froze me. Cold metal. Special metal. Special..I pushed my thoughts down. Stupid. It was just a tracker. And it was just metal. Something I could chuck away. It was nothing. I’m good. My family are here.  
I told myself. I always lie to myself don’t I?  
Pigsy and Monkey seemed obvlivious to my frozenness. I turned and went back to the bacon.  
I hadn’t turned into a dragon since.. Well ages. I don’t have to. And I can’t unless I’m feeling a powerful emotion. But Pigsy told me once I get through Duperty, I’ll be able to transform at Will. But who cares. I’m good as my human form. I’m defensive. I’m offensive. I’m strong.  
I looked up at Monkey who was fiddling with his staff. It was swinging between his fingers like he had done millions of times before. Moving so effortlessly. So..  
I watched feeling a deep grating feeling in my chest. Why?  
I shook the feeling of. Just cook. Just cook dinner.

Trip and Sandy returned. Sandy sat next to Pigsy and placed a kiss on his cheek. Trip did the same to Moneky. “How’s it going Kaedo?”, she asked me, her warm motherly eyes calming my feelings down. The fire inside me suddenly put out.  
“Good. I’m making dinner.”  
“I can see that.”  
I smiled and went back to cooking.  
After a while, I dished it up in the slices of bread Pigsy had cut for me, and handed them each a sandwich. I just nibbled at a slice, the bacon all gone. I didn’t mind. Seeing them enjoy it made me happy.  
Trip finished first, she had offered me half but I shook her offer Of. “I’m good Mum.”, it’s weird, I’ve never called someone mum before. But I was getting used to it. Getting used to the word falling of my tongue. She put her plate down. And flattened her robes.  
“Kaedo. Son, any luck with your powers yet?”  
I shook my head, hoping to calm down the tremors in my voice. From many years of being told I needed to learn, I was a failure if I failed.. It’s hard to admit I’m wrong. Hard to admit I can’t..  
“No. But. I’m trying.”, I had gotten through it tremor free. Father saw through it though, his eyes looking at me confused. His staff resting in his bun.  
“Good. Know we aren’t.. I.. It’s ok not to get it the first time? Ok? Your only a child.”, She said and I hummed. Still. It didn’t feel like that. Dad.. He..  
no.  
He’s dead.  
He’s gone.  
He was murdered by Ragnorok.  
I nodded, feeling weird. I just wanted to sleep and get on with the quest.  
“So. The fifth, scroll, the scroll of love, is in a days time. And the scroll of powers, which you guys retrieved i think had the ability to give a person a different species powers. Like me, a demons. The only thing is. From what I’ve read from the scroll of knowledge is, you have to take it from the demon which would render them powerless. This scroll is powerful. I could take Monkeys power using it. But. I won’t.”, She explained. No wonder Zeus wanted to keep it. It sucks the power out of any creature and gives it to to you. It was a freaky thought but well it did. Sandy and Pigsy has swapped powers for a day. That was funny.  
“So.. Lets all get some sleep ok?”, Trip said and I nodded. I climbed under with Monkey. I held him close. “Father.”, I croaked wan Trip has fallen asleep. It Felt like old times. Just us.  
“Yeah Kid?”  
“What if I could use the scroll of powers? It could speed up my-“  
“No.”  
I looked up to him.  
“No. You aren’t risking your life. No. And using a scroll for your own gain isn’t selfish Kaedo.”  
I scoffed. “I am a dragon dad.”  
“That’s no excuse.”  
I sighed. “I know.”  
He smiled and kissed my forehead.  
His hand circling my head.  
“I love you kid. Don’t forget that.”  
I hummed and snuggled wounded the covers.

“Wake up.”  
We snapped up.  
The scrolls.  
We turned to see a one eyed demon..  
Kamuru. How in the hell did we forget him?  
He had his sword around Trips throat.  
I snarled, flashing my un-pubescent dragon eyes.  
“Leave her alone.”  
Kamuru chuckled, his voice grating my nerves.  
“Hand me the scrolls, and I’ll let her go.”  
Monkey groaned.  
“The first demon in weeks and it had to Be you. You hurt her before.”, Monkey said, his staff extended, his bed head still looking ruff af the edges.  
“I know. Little weak pathetic-“  
Trip stomped on his foot, and ran to Monkeys side. The demon looked suddenly nervous.  
“Who sent you?”  
Kamuru chuckled, and his fingers twitched on his sword.  
“Why would I tell you Monkey king?”  
Monkey shrugged.  
I watched between them. The scrolls where safe, Trip was safe. Why hadn’t we killed him yet.  
I clenched my fists. He needed to die. He’s a demon. He’s evil. He hurt mum.  
“Tell us demon. It wasn’t hagfish. Shadow killed him.”, Monkey said and Kamuru smirked. He was byinf time.  
“Monkey-“  
It was to late. Seven strong demons appeared and attacked, lunging for the scrolls. Trip had her fangkris our. I lunges for the scrolls. Protecting them. Kamuru fought of Sandy, who’s attention was on two demons.  
He looked down at me. His eyes flashing red.  
“So. Willing to die for some paper?”  
I growled, feeling my dragon form trying to appear.  
I pushed it down.  
“Leave.”, I snarled.  
“Leave? Your just a pathetic human.”, He said and.. Then his foot swing for my side. I felt my body lock up. Why didn’t I block it?  
I groaned with pain. His foot stomped down and I watched. Feeling paralysised. I feeling creeping in my head, pulling at my mind. Telling me.. Dads going to hurt you.  
Suddenly I was shaking.  
I felt my body lock up.  
He kicked me, but I held onto the scrolls.  
He kicked the air outback of my lungs. A feeling all to familiar. A feeling..  
I felt myself panic.  
“STOP! STOP IT! DONT HIT ME!”  
All I could think of Zeus. All I could imagine was his feet hitting me. His dark red eyes-  
“STOP IT DAD PLEASE!”, I screamed. I didn’t want this. I felt powerless. Dad.. He’s- “PLEASE..”  
He grinned, swinging his foot at my back.  
The pain felt so familiar, it jogged all of my fear. It pricked a time my skin, my throat screaming at him to stop.  
“Pathetic human. You’ll die protecting the scrolls.”, he spat. But it sounded distant. All I could hear wasn’t my ragged breathings. His distant voice shouting.  
I felt my vision blurry. My mind flashing with beatings. Beatings. Beatings—

It was over. He faded into dust. I still stayed curled up. My breath ragged, tears strolling my face. My body shaking. My body feeling like he had hit me. Like my dad had.. Like..  
I sobbed.  
I sobbed. I felt like a pathetic child.  
The shaking stopped a while later. My lungs filling up with air. But my body hurt so so much.  
Pain. Pain. So much. So-  
“Son?”  
Dad. Monkey.  
I peaked out of the scrolls which I held against my face.  
I saw him kneeling down. Looking at me.  
“It’s ok. I’m here.”  
I wanted to reach for him, to hold him. But I didn’t. I just sat there calming my breathing. Calming my self down.  
I sat up and let the scrolls roll to the floor.  
I didn’t meet any of there eyes. I rubbed my own.  
“I’m.. I..”  
I couldn’t think of anything to say. What was there to say?  
I’m.. Still his victim. Still his scar on this world. Still the pathetic scared child I was when he started to hit me.  
I felt pain. I wanted to cry again.  
I sighed and walked to my bed, climbing in it.  
None of them told me to get out. They let me curl up into a Monkeys scent and sleep...


	2. Pathetic child

I woke up a little while later. I could smell my fathers scent, I mean I was wrapped up in his blanket. My body ached, a feeling I never wanted to feel again. My body had the whispers of shakes, my throat was hoarse, I was extremely thirsty. I peeled the covers of myself and grabbed my canteen. I downed it until I was drinking the drips. I didnt dare look at any of them, not wanting to talk.  
"Your awake.", my father said, I looked at him and then looked away. I didn't want to explain. I didn't want to talk. I just wanted this stupid pain to go away.  
Trip smiled to me, handing me some cold food. I looked at it and felt my stomach curl into itself.  
"I'm not hungry.", I said, by the position of the sun it had been a few hours since.. I felt my arms freeze, Kamuru, he had hurt me. I didn't fight back. Why didn't I fight back?!   
"Why.. Didnt I fight back?!", I snarled, to no one in particular. Monkey sighed, his eyes ghosting with pain.   
"Kaedo...You..I don't know. I wasn't there to protect you like I promised."  
Great. Just great. He thinks it's his fault. of course he does! But no it wasn't his fault, it was mine. I didn't protect myself. I got.. Scared... Terrified.. All I could think about was zeus. I didn't want to cry, it was pathetic. I didn't want to talk about my feelings. Why can't I have my own cloud I can call?  
"It wasn't your fault dad. It.. was no ones. I think I panicked. I... Don't remember much. But I'm mad at past me because I ache like shit."  
Trip gasped, "Kaedo! Thats a bad word."  
I was tempted to say she wasn't my real mum, that she didn't need to act like one but that would hurt me more than it would hurt her.. I kept my mouth shut and turned to dad.  
Monkey was quiet.  
"Where are you hurt?"  
I hummed and took of my leather top.  
I examined the bruises. If I was actually a pathetic human I would've had broken ribs. Luckily, just bruises. Although Zeus could do a lot worse.. And Kamuru was right, I may aswell be a human, I'm to afraid of getting hurt now...  
It was like this when I first was on the road, on my journey to Lion heart rock for the first time. I would panic, and hide away from people. But once I met a demon with the name font, and he taught me a few things, I managed to make my way to lion heart rock a little less like a scared abused child.  
I was snapped out of my thoughts as Trips hands ran over my bruises. She meant well, but as soon as our eyes met she knew she had done wrong. Fear etched my skin it made me scared, she had touched a bruise, and it sent a wave of bad beatings through my head.  
I panicked, and pushed her away, a bit to hard. a bit to much- She landed against a tree- I watched her groan and rub her head, she looked in pain. She's hurt. I hurt her. Because I can't control my problems. I'm dangerous. I'm dangerous.  
IM DANGEROUS-  
I lurched away.   
"Trip. Im sorry.", my voice betrayed me coming out panic ridden. Monkey had knelt down, and checked on Trip.  
She rubbed her head, her eyes flickering between us. I couldn't see dads expression but I guessed it was his hurt one. Hurt on my behalf. I didn't deserve him.  
"Kaedo.. It was an accident.", She said and I saw the blood.. All over her hand.. It made my lungs cut of my breathing. I did that.   
I did that.  
I'm to dangerous. I'm a live wire. A mine.  
I'll end up hurting her. Only because my trauma is eating me up. I'll end up hurting her..  
I rocked back and forth. I'll kill her.  
I'll hurt her.  
I'll-  
I pressed my hands against my head. Feeling an anxiety attack trying to form. My heart beating in my ears being the only thing I could hear other than my thoughts.  
I'm dangerous.  
I shouldn't have come here.  
I deserve dads beatings.  
I deserve to be scared, I deserve to be hurt, I deserved to die by his hand-  
I screamed, mostly at my thoughts.  
"Shut up!", I shouted, it caught all of there attentions, suddenly all eyes on me. I could sense Monkeys worry from my curled up anxiety trapped mind.  
I guess my worst enemy is my trauma.. I sobbed. I should never have found Monkey. I don't deserve any of them.   
I sobbed, my tears rolling all over the floor. My emotions are so high I could turn into my dragon form and fly away. forever.  
I felt him hold me close, his strong arms embrace me and my nerves set on fire. I snarled, flashing my dragon eyes.  
He rubbed my hair, thumb circling, holding onto me.  
"Shhh.."  
I wanted to escape.  
I wriggled, I snarled. I tried to escape, feeling claustrophobic.   
He held me, his arms locked on me.   
"Let go, I'll HURT YOU.", I snarled, trying to push him away. Pathetic I know. I didn't want him holding me. His touch ignited my fear, my thoughts. Zeuses red eyes. I pushed and pushed. Wanting my thoughts to go away. Not wanting to re see his beatings. "LET ME GO MONKEY!", I screamed trying to escape, tears flowing. I felt pathetic, ashamed. I wanted to run away. I wanted to.. Escape. Subconscious. From years of beatings. I snarled my teeth. "LET GO-"  
"NO Kaedo. I won't. Calm down.", He snapped, I felt even more panic ridden, I scratched him. I punched, kicked. He didn't let go. He held on like I would disappear if he let go. "LET ME GO PLEASE."  
I heard Trips voice of concern, "Let him go Monkey."  
To which he replied, "No. He'll calm down any second now."  
I didnt, I still kick, my nails digging into the armour specifically Made for him..  
He held on until the fight inside me died, all of my panic draining into a mix of sadness and fear. I had scratched him. His armour was covered in the lines of my nails. How is he not mad? I wanted to lurch away. Sad. beating. Angry. Beating. Mad. Beating. Negative emotions tended to land me a beating.. I met his eyes, mine filled with panic. He shushed. "Shh my son.. Its ok. I would never hurt you remember?"  
I heard Trip sigh, she sat back down, "Thank god.."  
Then I sobbed. My fear, everything draining into sluggish tears. Hot tears that when they hit the floor it hissed like it had been burnt. I let him carress me. Let him whisper over and over, that I'm safe. That he won't hurt me. That he loves me.  
He pulled of and I didn't want to look up at him. I sniffled. I'm such a pathetic wreak.  
"Kaedo.. Whats wrong my boy? Is it Trip? She's ok now."  
I nodded ad then shook my head, it was part of a list of reasons.  
I turned to the side and saw Trip, she was.. Fine...  
Nothing.. No blood..  
"I hurt her I don't..", I craoked and trailed of confused feeling shakes run up my arms.  
"We used the scroll of immortality to heal her. Seriously. Your screaming scared both of us. So.. Are you ok?"  
I sighed, rubbing my tear ridden face trying to clean it.  
"No... I'm scared.", I said and grabbed my leather top.  
I fiddled with my buckles, slipping my leather top back on. Distracting myself. He seemed to realise. "Your scared your going to hurt Trip, hurt her a lot more.. I guess that and I did hold onto you and I know you don't like physical contact..', he said and he swept my fringe across my face, "But Kaedo. Remember..Your a victim. Trip just forgot and she got hurt, its none of your fault ok? You've been jumpy since we met. She knows you would never hurt her. Not out of choice. I know what's going through that head of yours kid. I know you must be scared like sh... crap.", He said like a sigh, his hands ghosting my arm. I let a small chuckle escape at his censorship. I love this god. He knows exactly what to say. I leaned up and held his hand.  
"Yeah.. That sums it up.", I said, and he grinned.  
"And I'm sorry I held onto you? I know your jumpy since Kamuru hurt you. Again. Im sorry I wasn't there kid."  
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. The Monkey king has changed so much since I last saw him. He's become mature. Maybe he was before I don't know.  
He smiled, and squeezed my hand. "See you in a minute?"  
I hummed. I needed some time to collect my thoughts, because of me we've wasted time when we could have gotten the scroll..  
Sandy was staring at me strangely, I noticed and it dragged me out of my thoughts. Her normal clear blue eyes seemed focused, the sea inside them raging.  
When our eyes met, our elements clashed. Fire and water. I went to ask her a question but she looked back over to Pigsy., awkwardly and quickly.   
Weird.. What was that?  
I made my way to camp, sat alone but close enough to talk, holding my knees to my chest. The bags where packed. I picked up my cold food. And nibbled at it.  
I'm a weak dragon. I couldn't even defend myself against Kamuru. I got terrified of him, why? I know why.. But why? Why did I loose myself and become a scared child again? Zeus is dead. Simple.  
But hes not gone. No.. He's alive as long as I'm a terrified child.   
But let's be honest.  
I'm no dragon.  
I'm a pathetic child.


	3. Wanted to hide.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally an update! I will hopefully update more often for this because I lovvveee my baby Kaedo in this so so much! And the story’s just began!

After we all finished our food, Pigsy places is back pack on his back.  
“Right. Let’s go find this scroll.”, He said to us. I trailed behind him. My thoughts being preoccupied. Why didn’t I fight back? Why did I hurt Trip. I sighed. I’m such a child. We made our way to the cave of love, where the scroll was. I trailed behind Pigsy and looked up at the huge entrance, plants and vines draping over the mouth of the cave. I walked next to Trip but I couldn't look at her. Not after what I had done.

A scroll guardian walked out, wearing a very suggestive outfit, Pigsy and Monkey kept their gaze on her face, meanwhile I couldn't help look down the guardians sweet body.  
"My names cupid. Come and feel the love you guys. The little one can stay out here."  
I stared at the woman and snarled.  
"what? I'm on this quest!"  
She smiled, "Child, you shouldn't see what's in this cave. Not until you've finished growing.", She said tapping a whip against her thigh.  
"Why?"  
Monkey cleared his throat, "Pigsy, Sandy stay out here. Protect Kaedo. We'll get the scroll.", he said and his face looked red.  
I still couldn't understand why I wasn't allowed in the cave? Sure there was a woman dressed in leather straps and whip. So she torchers people?  
I snarled.  
"You think I cant go in because you hurting people and.."  
The guardian looked to the others, "Sure......"  
I looked up to Pigsy who looked awkward, sandy was looking around not really getting my gaze.  
'Sure buddy. Thats what the whips for.", Pigsy scoffed his voice drowned in sarcasm.  
I felt angry, how does he expect me to know what she's doing?  
Trip exhaled and held Monkeys hand.  
"We'll be back guys.. See you in how ever long it takes.", Trip told us I still couldn't meet her gaze. I would remember the monster I am.  
"Ok Mum, bye you guys.", I said and stepped away when she went to hug me. Not now thoughts. Not now.

I backed away, not meeting her gaze. I already felt bad now I was self sabotaging my relationships..

I sat crossed legged by the fire, Pigsy teaching Sandy how to cook.  
I watched the flames drip away my anxiety and fear, the warmth comforting and reminding me of a warm summers day or a gentle breeze.  
Sandy giggled and kissed his cheek as she got it right. God. She’s more childish than I am.  
I felt my heart become heavy as I thought that.  
I’m a monster like he is.  
Sandy stopped and her gaze landed on me.  
“Kaedo... You ok buddy?”  
I met her gaze, her water calming my nerves, her lips pulled into a line of concern.  
“Y-Yeah..”, I lied, every bit of myself loathing in self hatred.  
How could I have hurt her like that?  
All she gives me is love and comfort and everything and I go and hurt her.  
My mother.  
Tripitaka.  
I felt sick, how could I?   
How do I deserve this family.  
I don’t deserve anyone. I’m just going to turn into a monster like he was.  
I kept my gaze on the ground, my head brought close to my knees.  
I had to many emotions swirling around in my brain. To many. I feel so guilty. Like I don’t deserve them.  
I sniffled, rubbed my eyes.  
I’m still as weak as ever.  
I’ll never make any of them proud. I’ll only push them away. I’ll only end up hurting them.  
I sobbed.  
Pigsy and Sandy stopped what they where doing. Things clattering and I could sense there concerned eyes on me.  
Can they leave me?  
Please.  
Leave me to cry. Maybe my tears will help.  
I sniffled, and my body shook with my sobs.  
I wailed like a banshee, before placing a hand over my mouth, hoping I didn’t sound like a lunatic.  
“I-I’m Sorry.”, I chocked out as I felt Sandy hug me.  
“Shhh.. It’s ok... You know. I know what this pain is like. When my father abandoned me on the side of the road I felt as though it was my fault, for being a demon. And.. He looked at me so..”  
“Horrified. Like I was nothing.”, I chocked out, remembering the gaze he gave me after a beating. His lip curled, his red eyes looking over my pathetic body.  
I curled a fist against her back.  
“He hates me. He never loved me. Ever. Because I killed mum..”, I sobbed, not wanting to relive it, but my brain already walking through the pain.  
“Kaedo?”  
I pushed her away. Angry at myself, I wanted to hurt her. I wanted to push my pain onto something else.  
“Go away.”  
She put her hand out and I slapped it away, snarling. I didn’t want to hurt her. I didn’t. Please I can’t hurt her-  
“Go away! Go away! Leave me alone!”, I snarled, my fists clenched and my face wet with tears that still flowed.  
Sandy looked to Pigsy and he sighed.  
“Leave the kid alone Sands. His eyes have gone reptilian.. He’s pissed of.”  
I snarled at her, hoping to scare her if.  
Half of me wanting her back. Wanting her to sooth me.  
The other scared I’ll snap her neck or claw her back, or break her arms.  
I couldn’t decide what to do, my body was shaking and I felt confused.  
I didn’t get it.  
Why was I like this?  
Why do I want to hurt her for hugging me?  
Why am I a monster?  
The thought snapped my anger in half, making my eyes cry again, I couldn’t decide what emotion o feel, I just felt them all at once.  
“Go away.. Please..”  
It wasn’t a panic attack.  
I wasn’t angry.  
I was just.  
Scared.  
Scared of the thought of being that. If becoming him.  
Scared.  
Scared of him. Still.  
He’s dead.  
He’s gone.  
He can’t hurt me.  
But I could become him. I could become him. I can’t- I don’t want to-  
I really don’t-  
I whimpered through my sobs, curled up in the floor, wanting to block them out.  
I wasn’t panicking.   
I just..  
Wanted to hide.


	4. Comforted by the darkness of my mind

It was a while until they returned.  
I hadn’t eaten, not that I cared, and I was sat by the fire, wrapping my duvet around myself.  
They came out of the cave waving the scroll, I couldn’t even meet his gaze. Monkey sat down next to me, his eyes meeting mine.  
“Hello..”  
He smiled and put his duvet over me aswell, his warm duvet. I snuggled into it, watching the fire, ignoring the weight that tangle my shoulders and made me tired.  
“Hey buddy. You wanna know what it can do?”  
That was Trip, she sat next to Monkey, nuzzling her head against his.  
She kissed the side of his head and met my gaze. I pulled the blanket over myself, wanting to disappear.  
I nodded and she smiled and looked so happy.  
Not like I could hurt her again.  
I sighed at that thought.  
She took out the scroll and unrolled it. It looked like the others.  
“It tells you who your soulmate is. And it can connect you with another person with the red string of fate. I asked the scroll of knowledge.”  
I stared at the scroll, I couldn’t feel anything, I just felt numb.  
“Oh...Cool.”  
I turned back to the fire, wondering if I could throw myself in it. I’m the worst son ever. Trips given me nothing but love and I just hurt her in return. I’m a monster.  
The flames didn’t offer me any comfort. All I could feel was the warm blanket hold me together. I felt like I would fall apart without it.  
Trip blinked, she looked hurt but she turned to sandy and they started a conversation.  
The guilt stabbed into me.  
Pigsy Was making them a snack, and he probably wanted to get me to eat aswell.  
I’m not hungry.  
I’m not-  
Wait bacon?

I nibbled st the crusts of my bacon bap. Hating how I actually ate food. Shouldn’t I be punishing myself? Shouldn’t they be punishing me?!  
I flopped into bed before anyone else, the weight pressing me down, but it’s not enough to suffocate me. It’s just there, making me tired.  
I listened to there conversations. Wondering if the would talk about me.  
“So.. What happened in there? Tell us.”  
That was Sandy, I could imagine her clapping her hands and her eyes sparkling.  
“Well....”, Trip started but stopped, probably blushing.  
“We kinda had to... Well...”  
“Monkey. Just tell us. He’s asleep.”  
“Fine. She may have made us... Do a few things I didn’t think I would ever do. Infront of her. And she enjoyed it. Brbrbbr.”, He shivered and Sandy and Pigsy bursted our laughing.  
“Pffft. Don’t tell me. You seriously haven’t tried any of that stuff before?”  
They stayed silent. Most likely blushing.  
I still felt confused as to what they where going on about though.  
“Geez. The great Monkey king. Never even been a bit rough to a girl if you get what I mean.”  
“Pigsy! I just.. Think that’s stuff.. I mean it’s not my taste. Sure a few tried to get me into it but I didn’t like it. Or.. Me being forceful one.”  
Pigsy and Sandy gasped.  
“Hold the pots and pans. Trip was the Dom?”  
Trip squealed and I heard a duvet move which meant she probably covered her blush.  
Wait. What’s a Dom?  
“Wait so. Oh... Was Trip any good?”  
Monkey spluttered and scoffed.  
“She was the best. And now if you’d excuse us. We’re going to bed.”  
There was a ruffle and then silence. The fire crackled and I looked at the darkness of the forest. It was different during the night.  
I love the darkness.  
It’s always been my saviour. It would protect me in its shadows, and hold me. It comforted me after a beating.  
A beating..  
A..  
I was shaking again, I wasn’t panicking this time. I was sobbing.  
How much he hurt me. How much he would say.  
I couldn’t make sense of my feelings at all.  
I curled up into a ball, and everything out, covering myself in the duvet.  
I cried. Feeling to many feelings to say. All I could taste was blood, all I could see was his red eyes. I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve these covers, this family. I don’t deserve anything.  
I just deserve to be comforted by the darkness of my mind. Of him.  
Of everything that’s happened.  
I sniffled and stopped my stupid sobs.  
What would they do?  
I was weak. I wasn’t strong.  
I felt sick.  
I actually felt sick.  
“Dad..”  
I bit my lip, staring at the darkness of the blanket.  
I wanted them to hold me.  
I wanted them to hold me.  
I love them all so much. And I don’t deserve to. I ran my tongue along my sharp teeth and drew blood.  
I poked my tongue out to see the blood but it was a bit longer than usual. Strange. I felt hot under the blankets.  
I peeled the blankets of myself and sat up.  
I wasn’t tired anymore. The cold nights air cooled me down.  
I blinked up at the bright moon.  
It shone down and I looked down at my hands and screamed in fear.  
Monkey shot up and he looked at me strangely.  
I grabbed the metal kettle and stared at myself, seeing a half dragon stare back. I dropped it and looked to see I was still standing on my two legs but my hands had turned into dragon ones.  
My hands where scaly like my normal dragon form, but I..  
Wasn’t a dragon.  
I looked to see I had my tail and I had normal legs and feet.

I screamed and rubbed my hands on my trousers.   
I even had longer fangs and wings.  
Monkey looked st me in confusion and some dread.  
“Uh...Pigsy. What’s going on?”  
I turned to Pigsy who was blinking at me.  
“You think I know? I’m not a dragon dude. I read some stuff but. I’ve never heard of this.”  
He referred to all of me.  
I looked at my tail as it wrapped around me.  
“Dad. I’m scared.”  
I honestly was.  
Maybe this was a side effect to duperty?  
“It’s ok. Trip, the scroll of knowledge.”  
She nodded and unrolled it.  
It wrote, “Go to the temple of the first dragons.”  
I looked at myself and felt my self began to panic.  
“What’s going on?! Why am I- I’m really a freak-“  
I laughed manically feeling my sense of control slipping, I’m a freak, I’m a freak, I’m a freak—  
“I must be dreaming, tell me..”  
Monkey shook his head and rubbed my shoulder.  
I flinched and snarled. This can’t be real- I’m- dreaming- i- must-  
I pressed my hands against a tree I backed into. The tree caught on fire.  
I jumped back and watched as Sandy put it out.  
I looked down at my dragon-human hand and saw the flames flicker all over my fingers. It was unlike anything I’d ever seen before. The flames looks almost part of my scales.   
I looked up at my dad.  
“Monkey... We may need to detour the quest. Hehe..”


End file.
